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Writer's pictureReena Saxena

The Right to Choose

Updated: Aug 24

I came across this discussion on Reddit about whether working women would ‘CHOOSE’ to be homemakers instead.



Financial freedom is a much-discussed concept that exhorts people to save money and build a passive income sufficient to last in non-working years. It helps to have an inheritance or someone else in the family to look after your financial needs.


It feels good to say, “I don’t need to work for money.”


It sounds suitable for both men and women. One need not suffer a psychopath boss, a debilitating lifestyle imposed by inhumane work requirements or having to do something your conscience does not permit.


I arrived at a few conclusions on why this question is posed, especially to women.


1. Women are seen as having a choice. There is no social stigma against being a homemaker, though a professional might feel awkward doing nothing for a while.


2. A job, career or profession is perceived as a ticket to freedom – much more than financial independence. They are the ‘evolved’ species. Why would anyone want to make a regressive move?


3. Women are often conflicted between different roles—professional, motherhood, wife, daughter, or daughter-in-law. Men are commonly perceived as incompetent to run the household, not having been trained to do so. However, this is not always true.


WHAT DOES A WOMAN WANT?

I recall a TV show about the eldest daughter of a fatherless family slogging to keep everyone happy. Her mother expects her to reduce her lifestyle costs to save money for her sister’s wedding. It comes to a point where a younger man besotted with her is seen as a good match for her sister.


Some women manage all the household work and work outside only to earn money. While she pays the rent and bills, the man saves money to buy a house where her name does not show as a co-owner.


Nobody likes roles being imposed – be it that of a working woman or homemaker.


What do you think a woman would choose?


It is not very different from what a man would want in similar circumstances. Let us not make it gender specific.


Everyone deserves the freedom to make a choice.


There are other considerations before quitting work, not all related to gender.

  1. Money for sustenances

  2. The need to be occupied

  3. The need to feel relevant and valuable in your set-up

  4. Negative social connotations are associated with someone who ‘does nothing’.

DO WOMEN ADD TO THE CONTROVERSY?

In some cases, yes, they do. Women take pride in saying they work to keep themselves occupied or contribute to society, while the bread and butter are taken care of by the ‘man of the house’.


Some may flaunt extravagant lifestyles if their male colleagues can’t afford the same and generate envy.

EQUALITY LIES IN DECISION-MAKING POWERS

As long as women are given equal opportunities to contribute, grow, and make decisions in their personal and professional lives, they should be fine.


We don’t need to be ‘oppressed’ or ‘privileged’.






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